Wife essay

1: The thesis is that women are expected to do so much while their husbands are expected to do so little.
2: It makes the reader realize how absurd the "ideal" wife is.
3: No. She is writing what she thinks men want in a wife. She wanted for people to read it and see how preposterous the standards set for women are.
4: She is portraying wives as totally subservient to their husbands. She organizes a wife's services in long paragraphs. I would say it was totally silly, but i know she doesn't believe this and is making a point. She wants her readers to feel that what she has described a wife as is ridiculous. She does this because she feels that wives are treated lowly like property of their husbands.
5: Dear Judy Brady,
                   I admire your passion on the subject, however I thought that the examples of what you think a man wants in a wife was too long. Halfway through I thought to myself, "Ok, I get your point that wives are expected to do w hat their husbands want." I do however think that it was a good persusive writing, and that the extensive lists add to the absurdity of the point you were trying to make.

Hansel and Gretel Satire

Hansel and Gretel Satire

            Once upon a time, a woodcutter lived in a house in the woods with his son, Hansel, his daughter, Gretel, and his second wife, who was an evil and cruel woman.

            The mean Stepmother constantly badgered her husband, “These children are dumb and annoying!, Get rid of them! Take them out deep into the forest and abandon them!” The woodcutter did not want to get rid of his children however, and refused, because that’s child endangerment, which is against the law.

            So one day the wicked Stepmother told her husband, “Listen you idiot; you have to choose between me and your brats. They go or I go.” So the woodcutter locked himself in his room for a week and thought it over. At the end of the week he came out of his room, and told his wife, “Get out of my house you wicked woman!” She shrieked in anger and ran out of the house and into the forest.

            The wicked woman (I would call her the wicked stepmother, but she’s not Hansel’s and Gretel’s stepmother anymore) in a blind fury, stumbled through the forest, cursing the names of the woodcutter, Hansel, and Gretel.

            After a few cold nights of sleeping on the ground, which only served to make her bitterer, the woman, totally lost, came upon a house made of candy and delicious sweets. Not having eaten in days, she ran to the house as quick as her feet would carry her, not considering how bizarre it was that a house made of candy was sitting in the forest. Grabbing pieces of the house and devouring them hungrily, she hardly began to notice when it began to rain. The rain, which came on hard, immediately melted the sugary parts of the house and spoiling the rest. The house, who’s structure had already been severely weakened by the woman grabbing large chunks of it and eating it, compounded with the rain, collapsed on the woman. Out of the rubble came a witch, screaming about how her house was ruined. But before she could address the woman, the rain started falling on her, melting her, seeing as how she was a witch. So the wicked woman pulled herself out of the rubble and died after a few days from exposure and thirst.

THE END

Satire things of February 22, 2012

The Little Girl and the Wolf and the Princess and the Tin Box. I liked them because they were funny and poked fun at the old fairy tales by adding a modern aspect to them. One is similar to Little Red Riding Hood, though I'm not familiar with the other. In the Little Girl and the Wolf he has the Girl shoot the wolf, which is funny because you are expecting the wolf to eat her then later the hunter comes and save her. The other one is funny because the reader expects the princess to choose the poor prince, though she doesn't because that would make no sense.

Fairy Tales

The Ugly Duckling: A Duck laid some duck eggs, which soon hatched into little baby ducklings. But one egg hatched into a strange grey duck. Nobody like the grey duck, which felt depressed and sad. So the grey duck ran away, having scary experiences. Soon, however, the grey duckling grew, and it grew into a big beautiful swan.

Little Red Riding Hood: Red Riding Hood went to go give her grandma some cakes. Her mom told her to stay on the path. She got distracted and a wolf asked her what she was doing. She told the wolf about grandma at the end of the path, and the wolf went to grandma's and ate her. When LRRH got to her grandma's house the wolf ate her too. A hunter then saw the wolf and shot his head off. He cut open its tummy and freed LRRH and her grandma.

Fables part 2

The Old Man and Death: We'd often be sorry if our wishes were granted. An old man is tired of working and shouts that he wants to die. Death comes, but the old man doesn't really want to die.

The Swallow and the Other Birds: Destroy the seed of evil, before it grows up and destroys you. Some birds were watching a man sowing hemp seeds. The Swallow told them to eat all the hemp seeds, but they disregarded him. Then the seeds grew into hemp and rope was made of it, which captured the birds.

The Trees and the Axe: By yielding the rights of others, we may endanger our own. A woodsman asked some trees for wood for his axe; the trees let him have a young ash. He used it to make an axe, with which he chopped down the whole forest.

The vine and the goat: Retribution is certain. A goat was eating some vines. The vines said to him that it'd get revenge by being the wine poured on the goat's body as it was sacrificed.

Fables part 1

The Lion and the Statue: We can easily represent things as we wish them to be. In this story a man and a lion were arguing over which race was better; the man showed the lion a statue of Herakles killing a lion, but the lion pointed out that the statue was made by men.

Androcles: Gratitude is the sign of noble souls. Androcles was a slave who escaped from his master, and as he escaped he came across a lion with a thorn in his paw. Androcles removed the thorn and lived with the lion. They were both captured and the lion starved. The lion was sent to eat Androcles, but didn't because they were friends.

The camel and the Arab: Don't ask obvious questions. An Arab asked his camel whether they should go uphill or down; the camel replied, "why don't we go on level ground?"

The Eagle and the arrow: Sometimes we give our enemies the means of our own destruction. In this story an eagle is shot by an arrow. As he lay dying he saw his own feathers were part of the arrow.

The 2 Fellows and a Bear: Never trust a friend who deserts you in a pinch. Two guys were walking through the woods. A bear attacks. One guy hides, abandoning his friend, while the other plays dead. The bear goes up to the one who played dead but won't eat dead things. Play dead guy tells his friend a good friend never deserts another in a pinch.

The wolf and the horse: Men of evil repute, when they perform a good deed, often fail to get credit for it. A wolf tells a horse there is good oats to eat in a field, but the horse tells him that he only told him because wolves don't eat oats.

Fairy tale picture things

The lion, so mighty, has its fate to be decided by something so tiny and weak as a mouse.

Something so petite can coexist so well with something so powerful with the ability to easily destroy the petite being.

Dragged away, fading in and out of consciousness.
The ship was sunk on the jagged rocks of Salamis Bay
as I drown I feel something pick me up
It carries me to the surface faster than I ever thought possible.
I feel the skin of another human above water
But also the rough scales of a fish.
Who is this, that cares enough for me
That they would spend their time to save me, of all people
There were better men on the ship than I.
Was it random? Was I the only survivor?
The din and crash of the fleets grows fainter in the distance
All I hear is the gentle waves of the sea.

I play my fiddle for a growing crowd of ants, who are enthusiastic to see and hear me play. As winter comes, however, I am left hungry, as I cannot eat my fiddle.

I carry baskets of food for my wicked sisters, who do not thank me or appreciate my work. A magical fairy floats around me, trying to convince me to shed my rags and become the beautiful woman I could be.

Running trough the dark, misty, shadowy depths of the forest I go faster and faster trying to get out as soon as possible.

That damned fool to my left keeps making stupid jokes aimed at befriending the new girl. I just came here for some nice tea, not to hear the Mad Hatter babble.

At the first sound of the church bells the other militiamen and I rushed out of our homes and headed straight to the armory. We never figured we'd be tying down a giant man, a hundred times bigger than any of us.

I do not like this bed. It is lumpy and uncomfortable. There is also a bizarre lump at one spot; I imagine it to be some sort of deficiency in one of the mattresses.

Every night in my dreams I go out to play with the animals of the forest in a beautiful gown. I have tried to simulate it in the daytime when I'm not busy with the farm, but the animals will not come nearly.

Shakespearean Sonnet

Many a year ago, in the year 13

Far East there was a great mighty kingdom

And in this kingdom ruled a mighty queen

She had no children, therefore no heirdom

Suitors came, seeking great wealth and power

But the queen refused all, wanting true love

Searching for the bee to her fair flower

So she prayed to the Gods, high up above

For a husband to let her bear a son

The next day, a beggar came to the court

The people of the court laughed and made fun

But the queen said, “He’s human, don’t make sport!”

The beggar was her true love in disguise

Queen and lover lived blessed the rest of their lives.

My thoughts on four essays

I am happy with my time: I admire this author. He has shown kindness to people in desperate need, and displays a sense of duty, that it is his job to make the world a better place for future generations. Also he sees all people as the same. His experiences with our enemies of World War II, and the fact that at the time of his writing and still today they are all staunch allies of the United States, only reinforce that view.

57 Years after the war: This essay was good; it gets one thinking and, though it doesn't address it very much, it talks about the fact that so many veterans, from World War II and Korea, and even Vietnam now, are beginning to die of old age. From a historical perspective, these old soldiers ought to be asked about their experiences so that they aren't lost forever.

Disrupting my comfort zone: I wholeheartedly believe what the author is saying. Breaking out of your comfort zone is crucial if you ever want to experience life to the fullest.

If I were a Dictator: I don't agree with this person. They say that the Bible is the foundation of real Democracy, and that though the Athenians gave us the word for it, they never had a real democracy. Well their democracy was fitting with the culture of the time, where women were considered with less rights and abilities as men. But the Bible holds kings and royalty in high regards, and monarchies are about as far away from Democracy as possible.

The Siege of Rhodes

Demetrius, a pretender to the throne of Macedon, was one of the many successors to the realms conquered by Alexander the Great.  Demetrius’s father, Antigonus, had been one of Alexander’s most trusted generals. After Alexander’s death, Antigonus carved out his own kingdom in part of Asia Minor, modern day Turkey. Years after his father’s death, after much intrigue of assassinations, wars, and intermarriage, Demetrius, though only a juvenile, had become king of Macedon. In a war with some of the other successors, he was displaced and became a sort of Aegean pirate, harassing his enemies by sea, then retreating to hidden coves on foamy Aegean island shores.

The island of Rhodes, south of Asia Minor in the southern Aegean, was a powerful mercantile hub, and maintained a policy of neutrality, though they had a very good relationship with the Ptolemaic empire in Egypt. Demetrius was at war with Egypt, and was afraid that they’d use Rhodes as a forward base against him. Demetrius decided to attack Rhodes, and in 305BC he assembled his pirate navy and landed on Rhodes. The Macedonians proceeded to encircle the city, and prepared for a siege. After some time, Demetrius, growing impatient with the slow progression of the siege, ordered the construction of an enormous contraption, a massive siege tower, the likes of which had never been seen before. Its enormous and faceless front bristled with artillery of the day, and as it rolled out to the walls of the city, defiant Rhodians sallied out in small groups and fought the Macedonians guarding the slow-moving tower. There was savagery on both sides, but in the end the siege tower, being so heavy, actually began to sink into soft ground and was rendered immobile.

Demetrius, facing growing opposition to the siege on his home front and, combined with being seen as the antagonist in the war with Rhodes by the rest of the Hellenic world, abandoned the siege of Rhodes after only one year. Of course he could not take his humongous siege weapons with him on his ships, and so the great tower stayed behind. The Rhodians melted the tower down, and used the metal to create an enormous bronze statue, a Colossus, which stood over their harbor, welcoming incoming ships.

Action sentences for Feb 9

I sat in my chair in the waiting room, listening to the unrelenting hum of the fan. I tapped my foot impatiently, as I had been for the past hour and a half. Across the room a nurse at the front desk worked silently, and an old woman read an old People magazine to my left.

               

                “Hey poophead, give me your lunch money!” exclaimed the bully in his dull, unintelligent voice. His nasally friend sneered at me through his thin face, and laughed at his larger counterpart.  

Fun Squishy Mouse Story

Eight mice, bundled up in raincoats and sweaters, with their heads tucked in to their chests and their arms folded over eachother, trudged through the rain, which, along with previous refugees, had turned the woodland path through which they now travelled into a squishy morass of sticky mud. Two of them pulled a homemade travois carrying a sleeping mouselett and what remained of their meager provisions. The mouse's energy was very exuberant and certain of their destination. Boom! sudenlly there was a big explosion all the people were running frantic on the street. There were peopel every where trying to figure out what had just happened. There was another explosion."Remain calm" aloud voice said over the intercom. People were still going crazy. "Remain calm" the loud voice said again. There it was again Boom! another explosion. A cowBoy looking gentalmouse took Charge of the situation and said "yall follow me to othe side ,DO NOT STOP. Not for anyone". We Made a break for it, running across a feild. Bombs going off every where. some mice were falling others being blown up trying to save their fallen friends. We made it into town when the building i was about to run into was Blown apart. I was blown on my back from the Bomb. The cowboy lead everbody to a place where we believe are somewhat safe. As time pass, everybody got hungry. the cowboy went off to the forest hoping to bring back food for everybody. he looked and looked and the only thing he found was a kind of pineapple that only can only be grew in Spain. He was expremely suprised that he found such food in this little forest that nobody even comes to. He brough th pineapple back to everybody; everybody gave the cowboy a weird look because it was nothing they have ever seem before.